Actually, Alex might be the only one of us who isn’t sick right now. Ley and Gibby have both tested positive for COVID. I tested negative but have all the symptoms, including losing my sense of smell. That loss has hit me harder than I anticipated.
I don’t have anything big for you this week. I hope to have something for you next week. We shall see.
I’ve finished Netflix’s season 1 (28 episodes) of Frieren: Beyond Journey’s End. I finished it a while ago, actually, but for baby-related reasons I haven’t had the brains to finish this post. Better late than never, right?
Melancholy, meditative, meandering… Frieren: Beyond Journey’s End has won a spot in my heart. It is a fantasy adventure that cares more about the everyday personhood of its heroes than about epic plots or dramatic achievements. It made me cry, and laugh, and I love how it manages to be bittersweet and yet feel like one of the most forward-looking and optimistic shows I’ve watched in a while.
Continue readingYou’re a monster. If you’re a good monster, you’ll be able to resist your terrible urges for a long time. We like good monsters! You should be one. But eventually you’ll do something unspeakable and hurt those around you, those you love. Because you’re a monster. We all knew it would happen sooner or later. We were just waiting, dreading the day when you’d reveal how awful you truly are.
But there are other monsters out there who tell you that you aren’t a monster. None of you are. Just like them, you aren’t evil. Maybe you could use a better attitude, some self-improvement. Your new friends have lots of advice about that. But those others who tell you that you’re a monster? Lies. Jealousy. Those lies are sick mind games meant to control you, to trap you, told by liars trying to profit while you suffer.
You don’t have to listen to those lies. You just need to be stronger. You need to be harder, and faster, and better. You need to understand that those people who say you’re a monster, their opinions don’t really matter. They don’t really matter. You can do better without them. If you really want people like that in your life, make sure that you’re the one in control—not them.
After all, you’re the man.
Or maybe you have some other privileged identity, and the people telling you that you aren’t a monster are spinning a slightly different story. That’s not the important part. What really matters is that there are people who tell you that you should feel bad, and others who tell you not to worry about it. Which ones feel better to listen to? Which ones give you hope?
In case you couldn’t guess, this is a follow-up to Are Boys The Problem?
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I recall seeing some negative reviews of Strange New Worlds’ third season, reviews complaining about tonal whiplash. I think those reviewers didn’t understand the premise of episodic television.
I admit, the first two episodes of season three were VERY different from each other in tone. The first episode was the conclusion to a two-part episode cliffhanger that has had me on tenterhooks for over a year. The second episode was more like SNW getting back into the swing of things.
I was even glad that I watched the episodes a week apart instead of back to back (as they were released). But I’m not going to insist that a show I love for being episodic only release tonally similar episodes when they air two on the same day. Instead, I am glad to be gifted with more Star Trek to enjoy. I could use more hopeful sci-fi these days.
Dear reader, I am so close to having another, more in-depth post ready for you. But I’m prioritizing spending time with family and taking care of the baby, so here’s another picture of Alex sitting on the bed. She’s a good kitty.
I’ve made more progress today on a follow up to Are Boys The Problem?, but Alex in that picture above looks how I feel. Fortunately I have family visiting who are helping to take care of baby Gibby. Maybe with their support I’ll be able to post something longer next week.
This one woke me up early by yelling at me. She only quieted down when I stayed awake enough to hold her. She’s just doing her part, being a good example for the baby.
Maybe I’ll have more brain next week.
Here’s an oldie but a goodie. It turns out I do not have the brain (nor the time) to continue last week’s thoughts today. I will come back to that when I’m next able. Until then, I hope you like pictures of Alex the Cat. She’s a very good cat.
A reddit thread has been living rent free in my brain and scattering its gross leftovers all over the couch of my cortex.
Last week, while I was prepping my post about Some Desperate Glory, I read a post on r/newparents from a first time mother wrestling with her cognitive dissonance around having a son. She described herself as a feminist who no longer believed that all men were bad (she cited her husband as a good example), but who still struggled to reconcile her fear, animosity, and resentment towards most men with the idea of raising a young boy. She said (I paraphrase) she was trying to understand how to raise a young boy to be a good man with positive models rather than negative ones. She asked for help and advice.
I was immediately awash with thoughts, with so many ideas that I wanted to share. I wanted to lend my perspective as someone socialized male, as a camp counselor working with teens, and as a new father. Yet as I read on through other’s replies, I despaired.
The post has since been deleted. I’m not surprised that the post was deleted. I’m not happy about it either. I’m caught between wishing I’d replied faster and being glad that I didn’t stick my neck out. You might be able to guess why, but let me explain.
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Emily Tesh’s book Some Desperate Glory is an excellent sci fi story (“queer space opera” quoth many other reviewers) about living inside fascism, coming to terms with and recognizing that fascism, and trying to find ways to resist that fascism even when resistance seems impossible. It’s grim. It’s painful. It feels uncomfortably true, real, and relevant. I mentioned it in passing earlier this spring.
This isn’t a book I wanted to feel was more relevant after I finished it, but here we are.
This is also a book that deals with sexual abuse, assault, forced pregnancy, and suicide. I think the story handles them well, but they’re still rough. You’ve been warned.
With all that said, why does this book still feel hopeful to me?
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Fistful of Wits 